A loved one receiving a dementia diagnosis affects not only the individual, but usually throws a big, and immediate, lifestyle change into the whole family.
Let’s use an example. Our office recently met with a client who was struggling with a loved one facing dementia. This individual, let’s call her Jane, was experiencing medical issues, and while being treated in an independent living facility, stopped taking her dementia medication. Upon leaving the facility, Jane moved in with her son and daughter-in-law. But since pausing her medication, Jane experienced bouts of confusion and hallucinations. Now, the son and daughter-in-law are faced with choosing the best option for care, whilst still trying to maintain their own lives raising children. While a memory care facility is a great option for what Jane could use, it’s more expensive than an assisted living facility, which may not be able to provide the level of care she needs. So with this in mind, at-home care has been the path chosen, but this required the daughter-in-law to take FMLA leave from her job to accommodate Jane’s needs. Plus, with all of these difficult decisions top of mind for caregiving, they also need support applying for Medicaid.
Planning for dementia care is not a simple task. There are many responsibilities, decisions, and steps that need to be discussed. Remember, while being a caregiver is a selfless act, it’s crucial to recognize that this level of care may be beyond your capabilities—and that’s okay.
Choosing Care for Your Loved One
There are several options for care, but how do you know which choice is best for you and your loved one? Factors such as cost, your schedule and availability, the level of care required for your loved one, and how the change in lifestyle impacts your decision. Let’s explore the different options available:
Home Care
While caring for a loved one in the comfort of your own home may be your ideal situation, it’s important to recognize the challenges you may face. If your loved one requires 24/7 care, it may not be possible to carry on with a full-time job. If you’re raising your own kids while taking care of an aging parent, you may struggle with balancing your time and attention. You may want to consider respite care so that you can experience relief from caregiving. Occasional adult day care may also provide a stimulating and safe environment for your loved one, or it may be worth hiring an additional caregiver to care for your loved one while you tend to other responsibilities.
Adult Day Care programs offer structured activities, meals, social interaction, and professional supervision during the day—often giving caregivers much-needed time to work or recharge. These services can help delay full-time institutional care while enhancing your loved one’s quality of life.
Respite Care allows caregivers to take short-term breaks—whether it’s a few hours, a weekend, or a week away—by temporarily placing a loved one in a safe care setting such as a respite facility, or assisted living facility that offers respite care. Taking advantage of respite care is not a failure—it’s a necessary step to avoid burnout and maintain your own health and well-being.
If you’re caring for a loved one with dementia, you may consider simple tips that can ease the day-to-day responsibilities, including:
- Stick to a routine — Do your best to follow a similar schedule each day.
- Allow for independence — Let your loved one handle as many tasks each day as they can to reinforce independence.
- Keep notes — Together, keep track of upcoming appointments, events, and important dates in a notebook, calendar, or to-do list.
- Communicate — Be sure to communicate to your loved one as you help them with daily tasks.
- Take time for yourself — Make sure that you set aside time each day for yourself, whether that’s going for a walk, sitting outside, or going for a workout.
Supporting the Caregiver
Being a caregiver is a demanding role, both physically and emotionally. It’s essential to care for yourself in order to care for someone else. Here are additional tips:
- Join a support group — Whether in-person or online, connecting with others going through similar challenges can be invaluable.
- Ask for help — Don’t hesitate to reach out to family, friends, or local agencies when you feel overwhelmed.
- Be realistic about your limits — Recognize when professional help is needed or when it’s time to explore a higher level of care.
- Consider counseling — Professional support can help you manage caregiver stress, grief, or depression.
- Know your rights — If you’re taking time off work to provide care, look into FMLA benefits or caregiver resources available in your community.
Assisted Living Facility
During the early stages of dementia, before your loved one requires a higher level of care, assisted living offers a less expensive option. Most assisted living facilities still allow for a lifestyle routine, while offering support in other ways: such as meals being cooked, cleaning and other hygiene assistance, assistance with mobility challenges, and monitoring of medication doses. While similar to a memory care facility, an assisted living facility allows your loved one to feel like they have more independence while still under supervised care.
Memory Care Facility
A memory care facility offers your loved one a safe environment staffed with trained professionals in dementia care. While typically more expensive, this setting tends to prioritize your loved one’s comfort and provides personal care designed to meet your loved one’s exact needs. If your loved one requires 24/7 care and supervision, a memory care facility may be a great option.
Contact Us
If you have a loved one that needs dementia care, contact our firm today. We can assist you with strategies designed to help offset the costs of long term care services, protect your assets, and provide for your loved one. Schedule a consultation with our Board Certified Elder Law Attorney.
